So there is this young girl?

I'm a 62 year old man, married with a family, but my granddaughter has this cute young friend, she is 19 and i'm really digging her. I wanna ditch this old hag i'm with and go out with this young cutie pie. The old witch i'm with used to be great, but started to turn on me, i used to be in the Vietnam War, and I have very bad shellshock, so every once in a while to mess with me, she goes from a distance, BOOM BOOM BOOM WEEE OOO WEE OOO PATOOIE!!!! BOOM BOOM! she makes all these noises with her mouth and they make me hit the deck! And the we have is old and gross, i need a youngin' to spice up my life! So how can i convince this young babe to get with an old geezer like me?